Speak now, write later

I jist niver did thunk I kid fale a interview b-kause I could’na talk raight.

That is probably the most confusing sentence you have read in a while. But it’s true. Just last week I had a job interview with Progressive Insurance. On monday someone called to give me my results.

“Your interviewers didn’t think you would be right for the job,” the lady on the phone told me. “They said you had some problems with your ‘diction’.” Of course I properly thanked her while I was on the phone, and told her I appreciated being considered for the job even though I wasn’t hired. Then I hung up the phone, completely dazed and confused. The longer I thought about it, the more it surprised me that it had never crossed my mind before.

Here in the Journalism School at the University of Oregon, students are taught to write. We practice and practice until our fingers fall off and our brains go numb. But when do we practice how to speak? Well, I naturally assumed that because I can write, that I can also speak. Not true! According to my interviewers, I “have problems with my diction.”

What should I do? I am afraid to open my mouth to speak anymore, lest I display my ignorance of the spoken word. Of all the reasons not to be hired, this was the one I least expected. In fact, I didn’t expect it at all. Are there any professionals, or students, out there with advice for me?